Asheville's Spirit: Navigating Grief and Community in the Wake of Devastation

For days, I've grappled with how to address the devastation in Asheville. I needed time to process - to hear from my children, absorb firsthand accounts, and witness the heart-wrenching aftermath of Hurricane Helene. While Asheville has been in the spotlight, I'm also aware that communities across western North Carolina and eastern Tennessee are also reeling from this disaster. My focus on Asheville stems from the deep connection I've forged with this place over three decades - it's more than just a hometown; it's where my heart resides.

As I sit here in Greece, over 5,000 miles away, my thoughts are anchored firmly in Asheville. This city has been the backdrop to my life's most precious moments - raising my children, welcoming grandchildren, and experiencing the incredible strength of a community that rallies together in times of need. The physical distance does nothing to diminish the emotional connection I feel to this remarkable place and its resilient people.

We are in Greece right now, and I've been reluctant to share much about this beautiful country. It feels wrong to write about my sunny, peaceful days here while Asheville is going through such tough times. At times, I've felt a sense of guilt for not being there - not that I could have done anything to change what’s happening, but simply to be present, to stand with my loved ones, share in their sorrow, and support my community in person. It’s not rational; it’s just what the heart feels.

After the hurricane hit, it was a few days before I heard from my kids, Miranda and Jeremy, and I was incredibly relieved to find out they were safe. Both own homes in the area, and despite the wide destruction, their property and families came through it okay. When Miranda called to share that they were fine, she broke down in tears. Breaking with emotion despite her family and property being spared, revealed to me a deeper truth about this catastrophe. Even if your home and family were safe, there can be profound trauma from experiencing such devastation and seeing your community, your friends, your neighbors, your family - suffer. It's a pain that doesn't just fade because your property is intact; the loss is collective, and it weighs on all of us who hold Asheville dear. The feeling of helplessness, the disbelief, and the heartache are simply hard to take in. The emotional trauma runs deep - no matter whether your home is intact or not. You cannot witness or experience this level of devastation without feeling an immense, heartbreaking sense of loss.

My daughter's experience epitomizes this emotional paradox: a profound sadness for the community's loss intertwined with an acute gratitude for her family's safety. This profound and complex blend of conflicting emotions - grief and relief, despair and gratitude – is so real for so many who’ve lived through this.

So, to everyone reeling from the weight of this storm, there's no guidebook for processing such profound and traumatic experiences, and no words can fully capture the reality you're facing. The pain, the sorrow, the confusion - it’s all yours to hold, without any need to explain or justify it. And if you’re feeling alone in this, please know that you’re far from alone - many people are thinking of you, offering their support in ways big and small, even from afar.

For those facing the loss of loved ones: Words often seem inadequate in the presence of such deep grief. While I can’t pretend to understand the depth of your pain, please know that countless hearts are reaching out to you, offering love and support from near and far. Though all the love in the world can’t erase your loss, I hope you can feel this collective embrace and let it be a source of comfort as you journey through sorrow and healing.

I’ve been deeply moved by the stories and photos of Asheville coming together. Neighbors helping neighbors, strangers lending a hand - it’s the very essence of what makes our community so special. My son Jeremy, who works with Manna Food Bank, shared how, even after their facility was destroyed, they quickly set up at the Farmers Market to continue feeding people. Their focus hasn't been on their own losses but on their mission: helping those in need. And they are just one of many organizations and groups of individuals stepping up to support and serve their community during this time.

Chef José Andrés’s disaster relief organization, World Central Kitchen, quickly mobilized in response to the storm, supporting Asheville restaurants in their relief efforts. Katie Button promptly offered Cúrate’s operational kitchen to aid the cause, with her team already producing close to 1,500 meals. Other local eateries like Chai Pani, Botiwalla, Rhubarb, and Twisted Laurel are also cooking for World Central Kitchen, distributing meals daily through Bear’s Smokehouse BBQ.

And, of course, there's BeLoved Asheville, a non-profit that does tremendous work for the Asheville community, especially during times of devastation and need. If you're looking to contribute to a local, boots-on-the-ground organization that's actively involved and making a difference, BeLoved Asheville is a fantastic choice.

These are just a few of the many local businesses, organizations, and individuals dedicating their time and resources to lend a hand. This collective effort - an instinctive drive to support one another - embodies the very spirit of Asheville. It powerfully reminds us that even in our darkest moments, the light of human kindness and solidarity shines brightly.

While the Asheville community is coming together in a beautiful display of solidarity, more help is urgently needed, and the scale of resources required calls for federal government intervention. Speaking to reporters in Georgia last evening, President Biden addressed comments made by Speaker Mike Johnson (R-LA) about the storm. Johnson mentioned that the House would take up a disaster aid bill after the election. Biden responded, “We can’t wait. We can’t wait. People need help now.”

I fully agree with the President. Taking a five-week break to campaign while “Rome is burning,” so to speak, is unacceptable. It’s surprising to see this response from Mike Johnson (R-LA), a representative from Louisiana who should be all too aware of the devastation hurricanes can cause - remember Katrina? By all accounts, Helene was an even larger and more impactful storm, with a wider reach, stronger winds, heavier rainfall, and greater flooding. For Congress to delay their return to Washington and delay aid from the very people they're supposed to serve is, in my view, disgraceful. Please, Congress: Do. Your. Job.

With that said, if any community can emerge from such devastation and embody the true spirit of togetherness, it’s Asheville. It’s a community with a strength and resilience like no other. I believe in the power of the people who make Asheville what it is - the kindness, the generosity, and the fierce sense of community that runs through its streets. And as we collectively navigate this period of mourning and rebuilding, I hold onto the hope that Asheville will not merely recover, but will rise stronger, more unified than ever before. My heart and thoughts are with each and every one of you as you face these difficult days.

From across the ocean, Carla and I are sending our deepest love and support to all our family, friends, and everyone touched by the devastation of this storm. We are with you, and we stand with you in spirit as we all look to brighter days ahead for our beloved Asheville.